No Memorable Dreams, But Something Unsettling

Lately, my dreamscape has been a blank canvas. I'm not sure if that is a good thing or a bad thing, but it is what it is.

In reference to a past dream about Alzheimers and aging: As I sat there last night listening to my father chatting with us all about a funeral/wake he attended, I noticed him reflecting back on the same stories several times. At first I figured that i was the only person that noticed him rehashing duplicate memories, but John stepped in and finished a story that he was in the midst of telling. As I looked over at my dad's face, he had a bit of a glazed over look. I don't think that has anything to do with Alzheimers as much as it has to do with him feeling his mortality. He kept stating that Freddie Bell was 2 years younger than him.

On top of that, Juliet had mentioned that my dad is starting to "speak a bit like Jim", by talking about people we have no background about, and memories that are so distant that we are unable to relate. More and more, it seems as if he is trying to tell all of his tales in a race to say all that he has to. Maybe I'm reading a bit too deep into his actions, but I have a hunch that he may know something about his internal clock, or that maybe his brain is attempting to purge all that it can before it attempts to reboot.

I've been there before with my grandma, and I hope my father stays as sharp as a tack for years to come. I wish I were more of an optimist, but with him nearing 75 years old, I can't help but transform into a realist. I love my father more than one can imagine, and I'm pained to even think this way.. However, my life taught me early that humans are just that: humans. Luckily, I cherish every day on this earth, and make the best of spending time with my loved ones...tomorrow is never guranteed, and nobody knows that better than I.

An Old Friend In Serious Trouble?

I'm far from a fan of celebrities or their gossip but in last night's dream, Britney Spears was apparently an old friend who needed a shoulder to cry on. She had called me and I met her at some hotel that was pretty nice, but far from large. It almost reminded me a bit of the Westin in Whistler, but cozier and not too many guests.

Britney met me in the downstairs restaurant for lunch. She confided in me that she's not really crazy, but that she is putting on an act so that the press would back off a bit. Of course I stated the obvious and told her that this tirade was far from shooing the gnats away. We got to talking and she was crying and I got the vibe that she was an ex-gf of mine. After more tears and her asking me to help her, I got a phone call from somebody and I had to leave as she went to the restroom. Of course she had asked me to stay and wait for her, but I had to take off.

As I was gone, I got all kinds of phone calls from her, upset about me leaving. She told me that she never expected me to turn my back on her. I told whoever I was with that I had to go back because Britney needed me there again, and the person freaked out that I knew her. Of course I said "we go way back..it's no big deal." From what i gathered, Britney only had a few friends and I was one.

When I got back, there was a table with all kinds of relatives around telling Britney that she needs to get her life in control. I sat down and apologized for flaking on her, and I told her where I was at. After I told her, I was quickly doubted and a TV screen popped up beind a relative. A playback showed me by a pool talking to somebody, doing the exact opposite of where I said I was.

After Britney saw that, she called me a liar and she ran off. For some reason, a scene flashed and I saw her standing above a sink, slitting her wrists with arazor blade. Of course, I was startled awake.

This was probably the strangest dream I've ever had, and for some reason I had a humane connection with Britney. Very odd.